just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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