We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize