I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
