If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
where are you?
Hypothermia
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
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