I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
