I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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