woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
