just come out here and I will go home with you...
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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