i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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