This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
