new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Actions speak louder than pants.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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