he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I believe in your delicious
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
