It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
It's rum buckets o'clock
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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