so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
