Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
