I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize