; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize