i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
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He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
let's call it "werewolfing"
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
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Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper