Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
im holly from the hills drunk
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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