just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
