hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
