My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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