I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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