whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I want to stick my p in your. b.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Randomize
