yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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