Can Purell be used as lube?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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