I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
