i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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