I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I had to cum in my sink.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
