i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I'm passing your future prison.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize