Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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