How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
