halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
