Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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