Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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