Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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