Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
