Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
