I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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