thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
