Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
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he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Alive.
So much puke
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I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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