This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
