she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
