Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
