Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
you made out with another girl for some wings
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
