my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
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She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
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I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
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