Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
