Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse