he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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