You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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