That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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