Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
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